One Year Post-Monat

Facebook reminded me that I had posted about my Monat experience exactly one year ago today, so I figured it was time for an update. For those of you who aren’t familiar with this story, my Monat experience is actually what inspired me to concern myself with safe beauty and create the Better Beauty Clean Up Facebook group. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine that products I use on my body could so drastically affect my hormones! My original post got shared over 1,400 times. With that many shares, I can only imagine how many sets of eyes read it. I even received an email and phone call from a woman with ABC News. We’re talking the national news station out of New York, not local. While nothing ever came of it (so far anyway), it definitely presented me with the thought that I need to “Make my mess my message.” How fitting that quote came from Robin Roberts, an ABC News anchor. After having my story shared so many times, I received a countless number of messages from women all over the country who had similar experiences. Many of them thanked me for sharing my story since it allowed them to connect the dots themselves. One of the messages that stood out to me the most was a woman who said I may have actually saved her from getting hysterectomy! Little did I know that one year later I would be faced with a looming hysterectomy myself. As I shared in my original post, I was diagnosed with adenomyosis. While it’s not at all likely Monat caused me to have this condition, it’s very likely that it exacerbated it much quicker. Adenomyosis is a condition that is fed by estrogen, and the capixyl (i.e. red clover) contained in Monat acts as a phytoestrogen (i.e. fake estrogen). A simple Google search will explain what exactly adenomyosis is, and it will also tell you that the only true “cure” is either a hysterectomy or menopause. I hate to get into too many details about what I’ve been dealing with over the past year. Here’s the brief synopsis: Last summer I tried having a Mirena IUD placed, but I had a horrific experience with it and had it removed after only 10 days. Because birth control can sometimes help alleviate symptoms of adenomyosis, I decided to try the Nuvaring next. Well, that was in less than 48 hours before I could no longer take the pain it was causing me. (Note: I successfully used a Nuvaring in the past, but that was long before I had been diagnosed with adenomyosis.) Birth control just doesn’t not seem to work well with my body, so I was feeling all out of options. My OB had suggested trying a uterine ablation, but the fact that I’m still so young means it would likely only be helpful for a short time. She then recommended a hysterectomy. I got as far as receiving the approval letter from my health insurance as well as a phone call from the surgery scheduler, but I just haven’t been able to bring myself to move forward with it. Prior to all this I felt confident that I was done having kids, but the idea of having a hysterectomy at only 33 just hasn’t settled well with me. At all. Like I have lost SO much sleep over this, and been forced to increase my anxiety meds that I had been trying hard to wean off of. When it comes to making such a big decision, I believe it’s important to be at peace with that decision. I definitely am not. Not at this time anyway. I’m pleased to say that the last few months have been MUCH better for me for some reason. Still not great, but drastically better from the period that sent me to the ER back in November. Literally the only thing I’ve changed is that I’ve been consciously trying to consume only warm foods/beverages while on my period. This was recommended by a dear friend after she heard something about it on a podcast, and it certainly seems to be helping. Another dear friend recommended a local naturopath who specializes in balancing women’s hormones. I met with her for brief consultation last week, and decided if there’s anyone who could potentially help me it’s her. She told me that adenomyosis is a very tricky condition to treat, and a condition that she wouldn’t wish on her worst enemy. Yikes. Not gonna lie, that was pretty tough to hear. I will meet with her in early March for a full appointment, but most likely she will recommend I take prescription progesterone along with having regular acupuncture treatments. I am so grateful she does acupuncture treatments because that was definitely an avenue I was planning to explore next. Those of you who have known me for awhile might recall when I dealt with horrific unexplained chronic pain after having my first child. Another long story short, I saw every kind of specialist, had a multitude of different tests and treatments, paid visits to both the Mayo Clinic and Barrow Neurological Institute in Phoenix...but acupuncture ended up being what cured me and gave me my life back. The question is: Can the same miracle happen more than once? I suppose I’ll soon find out. As usual, I didn’t expect this to be nearly this long. I felt that I owed my Better Beauty Clean Up members an explanation as to why I haven’t put much energy into the group lately. I also feel like I owe my local friends an explanation as to why I may have seemed to fall off the face of the Earth recently. I’m usually the kind of person who is constantly getting people together, hosting parties and playdates, etc. The majority of my interactions with friends these days are spur of the moment, because I just don’t know how I’m going to feel if I make plans too far in advance. For that same reason, I have shifted my role at Little Cardboard Rocket and have just been serving as assistant. I can’t be relied upon at all for a good 5-7 days each month, and it really sucks that it has even caused me to cancel a few much-anticipated trips. I certainly can’t keep living my life between periods, so I REALLY hope I can somehow find relief. Above all, I am mostly just striving for peace of mind.